About the Video
- Video title: What Is Respect? How To Respect? | Thumoslang101 | S1E1
- Video location: youtu.be/9FPJFLZqwIQ
- Video chronology: Episode 1 in Season 1
- Video series: Thumoslang101
- Series home: Ri4CTV.com/Thumoslang101
- Subtitles: Available in 87 languages
- Transcript in English of Episode 1 in Season 1 of Thumoslang101
The Audio Transcript in English
1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:05,440 ABOUT THIS: Thumoslang101, the video series, introduces Thumoslang, the nomenclature for relationships, to all around the world. If you want to become an expert in a particular field, you must first learn of its nomenclature. As the first formal nomenclature for social life, Thumoslang is set to bring humanity to Level 2.0. For a demonstration of its power, watch Season 1 of the YouTube series Thumoslang101 on Ri4CTV. 2 00:00:05,540 --> 00:00:08,180 First of all, I just want to say, thank you so much... 3 00:00:08,180 --> 00:00:11,720 for everything you did for me the last time. 4 00:00:11,740 --> 00:00:13,300 I remember seeing you... 5 00:00:13,300 --> 00:00:14,913 running into me at the park. 6 00:00:14,920 --> 00:00:16,660 While I was shadow-boxing, 7 00:00:16,660 --> 00:00:17,840 you came up to me and asked me, 8 00:00:17,840 --> 00:00:19,940 "Do you mind letting me film you?" 9 00:00:20,400 --> 00:00:23,510 From there, we had a deep conversation... 10 00:00:23,510 --> 00:00:26,740 ...spanning over several hours. 11 00:00:27,600 --> 00:00:30,160 One thing you told me that really stuck with me. 12 00:00:30,300 --> 00:00:32,000 I still practice it today. 13 00:00:32,060 --> 00:00:33,360 I'm very grateful for that. 14 00:00:33,400 --> 00:00:35,760 You taught me the word, "respect", 15 00:00:35,760 --> 00:00:37,420 and what it truly means. 16 00:00:37,960 --> 00:00:40,640 You told me, respect means no interfering. 17 00:00:40,700 --> 00:00:45,120 I knew what they taught us, what respect means, 18 00:00:45,140 --> 00:00:48,240 but I did not really know the true meaning of what respect is. 19 00:00:48,860 --> 00:00:51,320 And I remember, after you told me all that, 20 00:00:51,540 --> 00:00:55,540 I went back home and pondered everything we spoke about. 21 00:00:55,540 --> 00:00:57,040 And I was like, 22 00:00:57,440 --> 00:01:01,640 ...man, without interfering is truly respect. 23 00:01:01,740 --> 00:01:04,400 I then started applying that to all my life. 24 00:01:05,100 --> 00:01:07,600 I started applying that to my day-to-day activities. 25 00:01:07,600 --> 00:01:09,380 I started applying that at work. 26 00:01:09,640 --> 00:01:10,980 I started applying that to my son. 27 00:01:11,160 --> 00:01:13,900 He is two years old his name is Jeremy. 28 00:01:14,420 --> 00:01:17,560 I explained to my son what respect is. 29 00:01:17,560 --> 00:01:19,049 I try not to interfere with things in my life... 30 00:01:19,049 --> 00:01:21,680 ...and it has actually helped me a lot. 31 00:01:21,680 --> 00:01:25,900 Adding that philosophy into my memory bank helped me a lot... 32 00:01:25,900 --> 00:01:28,740 ...with navigating through problems in life. 33 00:01:28,740 --> 00:01:30,800 Sometimes things happen. 34 00:01:30,960 --> 00:01:32,300 Just don't interfere with it. 35 00:01:32,460 --> 00:01:35,600 It has, too, helped me with decision making. 36 00:01:35,780 --> 00:01:38,140 I'm just grateful for that. 37 00:01:38,440 --> 00:01:42,840 I told myself I want to come back for more knowledge. 38 00:01:43,320 --> 00:01:45,140 That's why I'm here today. 39 00:01:48,320 --> 00:01:51,640 Nick: "Why is that not enough?" 40 00:01:53,140 --> 00:01:53,740 Ulm.. 41 00:01:55,720 --> 00:01:56,600 You know... 42 00:01:56,800 --> 00:02:00,140 I think, that is, knowledge is... 43 00:02:00,260 --> 00:02:08,700 I believe that different philosophies apply to certain things. 44 00:02:09,040 --> 00:02:13,560 Without interfering, to me, is like an overall type of stuff. 45 00:02:13,560 --> 00:02:16,380 Just like, when you try to build a house. 46 00:02:16,380 --> 00:02:18,540 You can be the architect but... 47 00:02:18,540 --> 00:02:22,050 ...you still need electricians somewhere to build it. 48 00:02:22,050 --> 00:02:24,750 However, you can't have the electrician until you start building the house. 49 00:02:24,750 --> 00:02:31,900 I'm in that place in my life where I need help with certain things. 50 00:02:31,900 --> 00:02:34,680 Certain things are coming up in my life right now. 51 00:02:34,680 --> 00:02:37,180 I just need help set the direction. 52 00:02:37,200 --> 00:02:43,180 I just need somebody help me redirect my mind. 53 00:02:43,380 --> 00:02:47,460 How can I become this person I'm trying to become. 54 00:02:47,540 --> 00:02:50,160 How can I create this person I'm trying to create? 55 00:02:50,160 --> 00:02:51,100 How am I... 56 00:02:51,500 --> 00:02:52,340 Ulm... 57 00:02:53,520 --> 00:02:54,200 Yeah... 58 00:03:01,520 --> 00:03:04,360 Nick: "I feel lost many sentences ago." 59 00:03:06,140 --> 00:03:14,560 Nick: Because I don't want to interfere with your disclosure, 60 00:03:14,560 --> 00:03:17,920 ...I refrained myself. 61 00:03:17,920 --> 00:03:21,800 Nick: I fought hard from interrupting what you were trying to say 62 00:03:22,020 --> 00:03:24,040 Nick: That's how I display respect. 63 00:03:25,380 --> 00:03:30,320 Nick: However, you got me lost in the first few sentences... 64 00:03:30,320 --> 00:03:37,960 ...because you used generic terms. 65 00:03:37,960 --> 00:03:46,350 Nick: I think that it's easier for me if you can bring me closer... 66 00:03:46,350 --> 00:03:54,260 ...to a specific problem, a specific event that made you want to come back here again. 67 00:03:55,000 --> 00:04:00,980 Nick: Make me understanding a specific problem first, 68 00:04:01,140 --> 00:04:06,820 ...before you take me to the general statements you made earlier. 69 00:04:06,820 --> 00:04:09,800 Nick: Then it's easier for me to grasp what you have to say. 70 00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:15,760 Nick: But you started with the big picture and I felt lost. 71 00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:19,220 Nick: Don't show me the galaxy on the first frame. 72 00:04:19,220 --> 00:04:23,480 Nick: Show me the Earth first, and then zoom out. 73 00:04:24,560 --> 00:04:26,840 Nick: So, what brought you here? 74 00:04:29,140 --> 00:04:29,880 Ulm... 75 00:04:31,660 --> 00:04:38,240 Nick: Which event, which problem brought you here? 76 00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:43,820 Nick: Why could you not solve it under your own power? 77 00:04:50,700 --> 00:04:51,300 Ulm... 78 00:04:55,480 --> 00:05:01,860 As you ask me that question, I just have to think about how to word myself. 79 00:05:02,940 --> 00:05:03,620 Ulm... 80 00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:09,320 Nick: "Time out!" 81 00:05:09,320 --> 00:05:17,160 I want to explain what has just transpired in the last few seconds. 82 00:05:25,620 --> 00:05:41,160 In the last minute, I practiced the knowledge that is called reciprocation. 83 00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:45,480 It is the basic cycle of communication. 84 00:05:46,240 --> 00:06:01,500 That was invented by my co-writer Mark Canny in the writing project we started in 2015. 85 00:06:03,620 --> 00:06:08,640 Halfway through the project, in 2016, he came up with reciprocation... 86 00:06:08,640 --> 00:06:13,940 ...as a basic cycle of communication. 87 00:06:24,120 --> 00:06:31,940 Before I remind you of the four elements of reciprocation, 88 00:06:31,940 --> 00:06:36,760 ...do you remember me telling you about that or not? 89 00:06:36,760 --> 00:06:37,760 [Ifeanyi shakes his head.] 90 00:06:37,760 --> 00:06:41,760 Okay, then let me ask you this first. 91 00:06:43,640 --> 00:06:50,260 Do you know the difference between reciprocity and reciprocation? 92 00:06:54,300 --> 00:07:00,380 Reciprocity is an eye for an eye. 93 00:07:02,640 --> 00:07:05,956 You scratch my back, I scratch yours. 94 00:07:05,960 --> 00:07:10,060 Another name for that is the Golden Rule. 95 00:07:12,040 --> 00:07:17,940 That is about mutual benefit but not about communication. 96 00:07:19,160 --> 00:07:34,580 Reciprocation is the label Mark Canny used to tag what he invented in our writing project. 97 00:07:36,740 --> 00:07:41,060 It's the most basic cycle of communication. 98 00:07:41,280 --> 00:07:48,400 If you don't understand or remember this, you would have a hard time knowing... 99 00:07:48,400 --> 00:07:52,300 ...how to exercise respect every minute of your life. 100 00:07:56,680 --> 00:08:01,940 So, reciprocation has four steps. 101 00:08:02,800 --> 00:08:11,680 The first step is carried out by the speaker: disclosure. 102 00:08:12,860 --> 00:08:16,420 When you speak you are disclosing some information. 103 00:08:19,120 --> 00:08:29,960 If I interrupt your speech and ask questions about your delivered paragraph, 104 00:08:29,960 --> 00:08:38,320 ...I'm not interfering because that's part of the first step, which is carried out by the speaker. 105 00:08:41,360 --> 00:08:47,760 Your disclosure is not successful if I'm not able to understand any of your delivered paragraphs. 106 00:08:49,300 --> 00:08:53,260 In that case, interruption is not interfering. 107 00:08:58,480 --> 00:09:12,460 If you are disclosing the information but, right after the first two sentences, I jump in and say I don't understand. 108 00:09:13,320 --> 00:09:18,880 Could you explain the first two sentences before you continue? 109 00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:25,860 That question is also an interruption but it is considered as interfering... 110 00:09:26,340 --> 00:09:29,680 ...because I did not wait until you finish your paragraph... 111 00:09:30,960 --> 00:09:34,960 ...before I do the second step, which is comprehension. 112 00:09:37,240 --> 00:09:45,420 I should never start my second step, as a listener, before you finish your disclosure. 113 00:09:45,420 --> 00:09:48,960 If you did not finish disclosing the whole paragraph, 114 00:09:48,960 --> 00:09:55,200 ...I should not even try to understand the idea that you're disclosing. 115 00:09:55,200 --> 00:10:01,300 An interruption may or may not be interfering. 116 00:10:06,080 --> 00:10:06,700 Hm... 117 00:10:06,760 --> 00:10:12,760 You don't know that if you don't understand the four elements of reciprocation. 118 00:10:13,420 --> 00:10:20,520 Most of us did not know of such things. 119 00:10:20,760 --> 00:10:34,540 Mark Canny did not analyze the reality of human interaction and label its parts until 2016. 120 00:10:37,960 --> 00:10:46,880 Once you finish disclosing your whole paragraph, then, like I demonstrated back there, 121 00:10:46,880 --> 00:10:52,140 ....I said, you showed me the galaxy and I got lost right away. 122 00:10:52,140 --> 00:10:55,440 Start with the Earth first. 123 00:11:00,520 --> 00:11:05,800 That's an example of how I show respect to the speaker. 124 00:11:06,620 --> 00:11:11,220 Nick: "Sometimes, when I interrupt, I'm not disrespectful." 125 00:11:11,220 --> 00:11:15,259 Nick: "Sometimes, when I interrupt, I'm very disrespectful." 126 00:11:15,260 --> 00:11:21,880 Nick: "It depends on how much that interruption is involved with the disclosure step." 127 00:11:22,740 --> 00:11:25,780 So, help me out. 128 00:11:25,780 --> 00:11:32,700 When you said I gave you the galaxy versus the Earth I understood what you said. 129 00:11:32,700 --> 00:11:36,140 I understand it but can you help me with... 130 00:11:36,420 --> 00:11:40,040 ...how to correct that formulation of sentence. 131 00:11:40,920 --> 00:11:42,140 Nick: "Say that again, please." 132 00:11:42,320 --> 00:11:44,420 How can I change my approach? 133 00:11:44,420 --> 00:11:47,940 How can I change the way I speak? 134 00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:50,840 When I was explaining myself, 135 00:11:51,020 --> 00:11:53,720 you felt like I went straight to the galaxy. 136 00:11:53,820 --> 00:11:55,380 How can I change that? 137 00:11:55,720 --> 00:11:59,400 Nick: "Always begin with the time and the place." 138 00:11:59,400 --> 00:12:00,960 Say that one more time. 139 00:12:00,960 --> 00:12:02,960 Nick: "Always begin with... 140 00:12:03,760 --> 00:12:11,360 ...a specific point in time when, and a particular place where, the event took place... 141 00:12:11,560 --> 00:12:15,960 ...that brought us together for this conversation." 142 00:12:15,960 --> 00:12:18,260 So, always begin with time... 143 00:12:18,260 --> 00:12:19,300 Nick: "Time and place..." 144 00:12:19,660 --> 00:12:30,360 Nick: "...so that people begin with the Earth first, before you bring them to another galaxy." 145 00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:31,560 [Laughters] 146 00:12:32,800 --> 00:12:36,300 So, okay. So, I should say like, so, time, like... 147 00:12:36,520 --> 00:12:39,980 Nick: "For example, 148 00:12:40,180 --> 00:12:44,260 ...my wife and I are having a big argument... 149 00:12:44,260 --> 00:12:47,300 ...but this is different from the past. 150 00:12:47,800 --> 00:12:54,060 A week ago, she started this and I reacted in that way. 151 00:12:54,920 --> 00:13:01,000 Suddenly, you have a hook to heighten my interest. 152 00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:08,440 In that way, I first focus on the Earth before you zoom out and say, 153 00:13:08,440 --> 00:13:15,160 "You see, this is related to another event, in another galaxy, long ago." 154 00:13:16,920 --> 00:13:21,900 Nick: And then I can start to see the whole galaxy without feeling lost. 155 00:13:23,300 --> 00:13:24,020 Yeah... 156 00:13:24,260 --> 00:13:27,100 Nick: Always begin with time and place. 157 00:13:27,100 --> 00:13:29,260 Yeah, I've always known that too. 158 00:13:29,260 --> 00:13:32,600 My communication is often scattered. 159 00:13:32,600 --> 00:13:34,680 I jump everywhere. 160 00:13:34,680 --> 00:13:35,860 I noticed that. 161 00:13:35,900 --> 00:13:42,620 Nick: When people are polite, and most people are polite, 162 00:13:42,620 --> 00:13:47,520 ...they will not raise their hand and say that they are lost. 163 00:13:47,520 --> 00:13:53,840 Nick: Instead, they continue sitting pretty and pretending like they're listening. 164 00:13:53,840 --> 00:13:56,760 Nick: However, as you're talking and while they're feeling lost, 165 00:13:56,760 --> 00:13:59,840 Nick: ...they think about other problems in their life. 166 00:13:59,840 --> 00:14:05,040 Nick: Because they couldn't follow you and yet they don't want to interrupt. 167 00:14:06,120 --> 00:14:14,840 Nick: If they did that, they interfere, disrespect the conversation. 168 00:14:15,560 --> 00:14:17,700 Nick: They disrespect their time. 169 00:14:17,700 --> 00:14:20,883 Nick: They disrespect your time, 170 00:14:20,883 --> 00:14:24,420 ...as the communication cycle fails. 171 00:14:26,980 --> 00:14:33,680 Nick: As a listener, you have to interrupt when the communication cycle fails. 172 00:14:35,360 --> 00:14:41,850 Nick: Otherwise, without your interruption, the speaker goes on and on, 173 00:14:41,850 --> 00:14:45,860 ... and waste everyone's time. 174 00:14:48,840 --> 00:14:49,500 Well... 175 00:14:49,640 --> 00:14:53,860 Nick: Knowing when to interrupt, and when not interrupt, 176 00:14:53,860 --> 00:14:59,960 ...could not be nailed down as a science until 2016, 177 00:14:59,980 --> 00:15:05,880 ...when that knowledge was spelled out mathematically. 178 00:15:06,860 --> 00:15:08,560 I like that. 179 00:15:09,340 --> 00:15:12,300 I'm very... That's why I was coming back. 180 00:15:12,300 --> 00:15:15,320 I come back for more knowledge. 181 00:15:15,500 --> 00:15:22,100 This is the only place that I know for sure you can dissect me and break me down, 182 00:15:22,100 --> 00:15:26,980 ...and really show me what I need to do and how I need to grow as a person. 183 00:15:27,260 --> 00:15:29,680 I'm a very good student. 184 00:15:29,800 --> 00:15:31,280 I want to learn. 185 00:15:31,280 --> 00:15:34,740 I want to be a great male one day. 186 00:15:34,740 --> 00:15:36,840 I want to be a leader. 187 00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:38,220 I want to lead my people. 188 00:15:38,360 --> 00:15:39,740 I want to lead people. 189 00:15:39,740 --> 00:15:40,940 I want to... 190 00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:42,260 Nick: "There you go again." 191 00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:48,920 Nick: "You are taking me away from the Earth, before you show me the Earth." 192 00:15:49,060 --> 00:15:50,400 So, you bring that up... 193 00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:53,100 Nick: "You are wasting your time and my time again." 194 00:15:53,100 --> 00:15:55,040 Really, break it down for me. 195 00:15:55,040 --> 00:15:58,420 Nick: "Start with the time and place of your problem." 196 00:15:58,420 --> 00:16:01,780 Nick: "What's the specific problem that brought you here?" 197 00:16:03,720 --> 00:16:05,810 Oh no, but I wasn't talking about a problem. 198 00:16:05,810 --> 00:16:07,140 I was just thanking you. 199 00:16:07,140 --> 00:16:08,260 I'm thanking you. 200 00:16:08,260 --> 00:16:10,840 Nick: "You are not telling me anything that I didn't know." 201 00:16:11,080 --> 00:16:11,760 [Laughing] 202 00:16:11,940 --> 00:16:13,400 Nick: "You want to learn." 203 00:16:13,400 --> 00:16:14,620 Yeah 204 00:16:14,620 --> 00:16:15,600 Nick: "That's why you're here." 205 00:16:15,600 --> 00:16:23,340 Nick: "If you tell me that once, not bad; twice, not way too bad." 206 00:16:23,840 --> 00:16:27,620 Nick: "But I hear that several times today already." 207 00:16:27,620 --> 00:16:29,180 Nick: And I thus say, wait a minute, 208 00:16:29,200 --> 00:16:32,020 Nick: ...why did he keep telling me all of that again and again? 209 00:16:32,020 --> 00:16:33,240 Ah... 210 00:16:33,400 --> 00:16:34,520 Nick: In there, out here 211 00:16:34,520 --> 00:16:35,920 Ah... 212 00:16:35,920 --> 00:16:37,640 So, I said that numerous times. 213 00:16:38,000 --> 00:16:39,080 So, what does that do? 214 00:16:39,080 --> 00:16:39,580 What does that... 215 00:16:39,580 --> 00:16:41,800 Nick: "You're just wasting your time and mine... 216 00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:44,820 Nick: ...because you keep disclosing the same, old information... 217 00:16:44,820 --> 00:16:46,100 Nick: ...that I knew already..." 218 00:16:46,260 --> 00:16:46,760 Wow 219 00:16:48,580 --> 00:16:49,080 Wow 220 00:16:49,360 --> 00:16:50,980 Okay, I, look, well... 221 00:16:51,020 --> 00:16:55,940 Nick: "...on the one hand. On the other hand, my focus right now is the Earth." 222 00:16:55,940 --> 00:16:59,380 Nick: "You're not taking me there as quickly as possible..." 223 00:16:59,620 --> 00:17:02,760 Nick: "...and so I'm not able to hear anything else you say." 224 00:17:05,720 --> 00:17:06,600 Alright 225 00:17:08,040 --> 00:17:09,400 Let me think of... 226 00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:12,273 ...where I want to start from. 227 00:17:12,273 --> 00:17:20,339 Nick: "The time and place of the event that made you feel like you did not have enough knowledge." 228 00:17:22,040 --> 00:17:27,200 Alright, well, I've very interesting story. 229 00:17:27,440 --> 00:17:29,940 I'd say, right now, I'd say... 230 00:17:30,040 --> 00:17:31,440 Two weeks ago... 231 00:17:31,980 --> 00:17:32,900 Nick: "Thank you." 232 00:17:32,900 --> 00:17:34,900 [Nick claps his hands.] 233 00:17:35,100 --> 00:17:36,980 Two weeks ago... 234 00:17:37,520 --> 00:17:43,820 Two weeks ago, I lost my job. I lost my summer job. 235 00:17:43,820 --> 00:17:52,900 Nick: "Time out, to explain to viewers, you got me hooked." 236 00:17:54,420 --> 00:17:56,300 Nick: "I have goosebumps..." 237 00:17:58,680 --> 00:18:03,600 Nick: "...with four words: I lost my job." 238 00:18:03,600 --> 00:18:09,500 Nick: "When you say, two weeks ago, I'm interested." 239 00:18:09,500 --> 00:18:16,060 Nick: "And then you say, I lost my job, I got goosebumps." 240 00:18:16,060 --> 00:18:30,340 Nick: "So, within few words, within half a sentence, you connected with the audience emotionally." 241 00:18:30,340 --> 00:18:35,660 Nick: "Compare that with your five minutes of disclosure..." 242 00:18:35,660 --> 00:18:42,540 Nick: "...about life, the universe and everything, back 10 minutes ago." 243 00:18:42,820 --> 00:18:43,920 Nick: "Do you see the big difference?" 244 00:18:44,060 --> 00:18:44,560 Yeah 245 00:18:45,420 --> 00:18:46,260 yeah 246 00:18:47,040 --> 00:18:49,280 Nick: "Now, let's go back to that." 247 00:18:49,280 --> 00:18:52,320 Nick: "Sorry to interrupt but I need to explain to you about..." 248 00:18:52,320 --> 00:18:56,120 Nick: "...the power of the Earth versus the galaxy." 249 00:18:56,120 --> 00:18:59,620 [Laughters] 250 00:18:59,760 --> 00:19:01,600 Nick: "Now, my interest is heightened." 251 00:19:01,600 --> 00:19:03,340 Now, yeah 252 00:19:03,360 --> 00:19:09,640 Nick: "I'm ready for what's next in your story of, two weeks ago, I lost my job." 253 00:19:09,820 --> 00:19:12,360 Two weeks ago, I lost my job. 254 00:19:12,560 --> 00:19:21,720 [*** To be continued by Episode 2 in Season 1 of Thumoslang101 ***] The story about how I lost my job is very, very interesting.